Ragdoll Cat Forums

Hi everyone.

I hope I am posting in the right section. As Milo is still only 9 months old I thought I would put my thread in the kitten section.

Before I carry on with my thread I just want you all to know that I love Milo for what he is and would never want to be without hime. I am though after your advice and thoughts.

I am a novice cat owner. Before adopting Milo I did loads of research into the Ragdoll breed and visited a number of reputable breeders. I kept hearing the same message, that the Ragdoll had loving temperaments although of course they all have their own persionality and that they are great with children. As much as I love Milo I am beginning to wonder if his rather bossy personality is down to being a kitten or is this just how he is and is going to be. Maybe I have a 'rogue' Ragdoll - bless him!

Let me explain. Milo is a big handsome, neutered boy. He is our only pet. He is left approx 4 hours, 5 days a week in school term time only. Because his toys are all untouched when I get home from work I guess he uses this time for sleeping. He is a pretty quiet guy, only having a couple of mad half hours a day. He is totally pampered and respected by all members of the family. I rotate his toys every couple of days and he has scratching posts. He kept indoors 24/7 with full run of the house . He is absolutely fantastic round the house and always has been.

He is not a lap cat which of course we didn't expect him to be, but he has never shown much affection towards any of us. Sometimes he is happy to be in the same room as us other times he is not. He has never brushed up against us or even tried to sit next to us in the 6 months that we have had him. I can cope with this but he can be rather bossy, especially with my 8 year old son. When I say bossy maybe I should say 'bitey'. My son has always been great with Milo and treats him with the greatest of respect but even if he goes to stroke him 9 times out of 10 he will turn and nip my son. He will do this to me also if say for example I pick him off the dining room table. When we stroke him if he is lying down he will start to twitch the end of his tail so I guess this means we are irritating him.

I certainly wouldn't class Milo as an aggresive cat. He has never scratched or hissed at any of us but does like to use his teeth on us to show us who is boss. Thank goodness he has never drawn blood!

I am really hoping that someone will tell me this is how Ragdoll kittens sometimes act and that he will mellow with age.

As I said earlier, I love Milo for what he is but would really appreciate your advice/thoughts on how I can stop him biting and hopefully be more loving towards us.

Many thanks
Cherry

How does he react to interactive toys like wands and Da Bird?

Hi Jan

Yes he plays fine with them. Doesn't get aggressive or anything like that. Just as I would expect a kitten to play with wands etc. He also loves to chase balls. He loves us to throw tinfoil balls upstairs for him to run and catch. Can I ask why?

Thanks
Cherry

He is still a baby he may be geting confused with play toys and your hand or fingers.
If you wear him out playing with an interactive toy and then try to pet touch him will he still try to bit?
If he was mine and he checks out health wise with the vet ..
I would try wearing him out not with fingers or hand but with a interactive toy then offer a snack and try petting him on his back I would sit on the floor beside him this way easier to touch and offer treats.We have been doing this type play with are kitties for over a year now we have other play time through out the day but this one is quite a ritual we set up all there tents and they have there favorite game now we call peek-a-boo my youngest tells us now when it is time for this special playtime we do this twice a day late morning and after dinner hr.We never had to use treats but treats are all ways good to reinforce positive behavior.
I all so have treats beside me on the sofa that I give out in the evening Cello tells me now when it is treat time..he was a little stand offish as a baby and it has help him out a lot.Jan suggested I do this and has help alot it took about 5 months for him to get the idea.

My Ruby is VERY similar to your Milo! Most of the time she loathes being touched, and she flicks her tail and usually will get up and move if she realises you aren't going to stop. She also will only tolerate being held when she's 95% asleep, otherwise she starts to growl which means, "stop this foolishness now to avoid claws to the flesh". The only time she's really affectionate is after we've shut our other kitten, Pyjamas, in the bathroom, and she's had a full nite sleep with us in the bedroom. We usually wake up to a purring, annoyingly affectionate cat laying on us.

Where are you touching Milo? How does he react when you touch his head only? Some cats hate being touched on their bodies.

It sounds like, for the time being, this may just be the way he is. He may only want attention when it's on his terms, and in general sounds very very independent. I know it is so frustrating, because you buy the kitten with certain expectations as I had with Ruby.

I'm not sure how you feel about getting another cat as a companion for Milo. Once we got Pyjamas, they do play alot and when we want some kitteny affection we scoop Pyjamas up and he's usually good for a big cuddle. It may be that he'll really appreciate having the company of another cat, and it'll divert a lot of the pats and cuddles from him which it sounds like he might be just fine with. LOL

Otherwise I'm not sure what to tell you. He may mellow out more as he gets older...he's still only a baby really. Just try to respect his wishes. At the same time, you can try to feed him by hand if you want to try to nurture good associations with your hands. Sometimes I'll feed Ruby chicken and she'll eat it out of my hand, or I'll put pieces next to me on the couch so she has to jump up and be near me to get them.

I wish you good luck....definitely hang in there

Aw, I can understand your predicament....especially with Milo biting your 8 year old. I would have said that maybe he was play biting, but you mentioned the tail twitching which shows a cat is aggravated & means back off.

Maybe start by carrying Milo around and make it a fun and interesting event. For example, you could carry him over to window and say, oh look at those birds! He will associate you carrying him as a good thing....something exciting to do and see. Or try to hold him while sitting down, and have a dangle toy with feathers ready to go.

If he likes to be groomed, set him on a bathroom vanity to start with, and massage him prior to combing him and talk soothingly to him.

Maybe try some Feliway plug-ins to calm him down and make him mellow. Some people on the forum have good results with this diffuser.

Also, the treat suggestion by Jum's is an excellent one!

Hi!
Dakota is 1 year old, and for the first 5 months he was here he would always sleep over by the door--pretty far way away from us, and I thought some of the same things you are thinking now, but has he has gotten older, he has definatly gotten more 'cuddly', and often sleeps on the couch next to me or on my lap. Its almost as if he went through a rebelious teenage stage!Maybe Milo is in this stage right now. Dakota bites sometimes too (not to hard though), but we use a squirt bottle, on him when he does, and he knows that he is getting too rough. Good luck with little Milo!

It seems even raggies go through the sulky, rebellious teens! I hope Milo calms down, at 9 months I think its safe to assume he is still in the kitten stage Lancelot never used to be a cuddle bug either, I don't know if its the cold weather or age but finally at 1 1/2 years he is a regular lap warmer of course he always plonks himself right in the middle of what you're doing haha. Just be patient for little Milo to grow out of kittenhood. Good luck!

Cherry-- I know exactly how you feel. Every time I visited Mishka before bringing her home, she wanted nothing more than to lie on me. She has not been a cuddly kitty since she came home at 12 weeks, and she's 14 months old now.

Mishka has always been very "teeth-challenged". She will not tolerate being held "Raggie-flop style" and will grab the free hand and pull it to her teeth. She sometimes drew blood but did not actually penetrate into the flesh. When I carry her, I put her top half over my shoulder, support her bottom half, and massage the back of her neck. We never try to scratch under her neck unless she initiates it.

We have gotten alot better at reading Mishka's signals. When we give "sagges", rubs, and scrubs, we use one hand on the back of her neck and the other on her hindquarters. She just purrs and purrs, but we do not then try for under her neck unless we're sure of her signals.

When she starts to get nippy, we tell her that no, we don't play that way. When we show her the spray bottle (and we have several around the house), she knows not to try whatever she was contemplating. Sometimes she thinks that our play session was too short, and she will stalk and attack me. I've learned to be aware of her plans and let her know, loudly, that she'd better think about it.

Mishka, while not a lap kitty, must be near us wherever we are in the house. We adore her; and my husband, not a real cat person, says he never thought that she would be such an important part of our lives. She's a really independent girl who still requires play and interaction, but on her terms. We're only too glad to oblige!!

Our Solo still bites occasionally to let us know when we are pushing his limits. He doesn't draw blood, it is more he places his teeth on you to communicate. Solo has also never growled or hissed, or swatted at us (unless we were teasing him with our hands during play). Usually he does this when we roll him over using our feet. He likes to lay around on the kitchen floor, and it is soooo tempting to roll him over and pet his tum tum with your foot, but he does not like that He will always let you roll him with your hand, but I guess he thinks feet are weird.

When Solo was a little baby he was kinda nippy, like a puppy. All it took was a firm NO, and it was I who showed him I am his boss. These smart little guys will get away with only what you let them!

This is just the means these guys have to communicate. I would imagine if your adolescent boy were any other breed, he may be biting a bit harder Part of it may be him being a teenager. My parents have two very aloof kitties. As they have grown older, she has mentioned to me that they both seem to be turning more friendly and affectionate. One is 3 the other is 6 years old.