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Nelson's aunt, the last of her generation of family, is having her 90th birthday party in Clearwater, FL. She was always such a fun person, sassy and cool all her life. She doesn't jitterbug anymore, but she's lost none of the sass. She moved from a 3 bedroom home into a retirement apartment, so I'm sure she's sort on space.
Aunt Lollie and Uncle John practically raised Nelson and his three siblings after Nelson's dad took a powder with his secretary when Nelson was only 8. Nelson's mom had to go to work and Lollie and John stepped in and were very good and loving parents while Midge worked. Nelson has never lost his gratitude and the love has only grown between them. She treats Nelson no differently from her own two sons- including a whop up side the head if he smarts off.
So, what do you do to show her she is still special as ever: Five hundred miles away, 90 years old, in a generally hot and humid climate, never terribly crafty. She'd rather have raced her '65 Mustang than knit a doily.
I thought of music from the three decades when she did the most dancing=30's-50's, but I don't know if she can operate a CD player. If I were her, I think I'd be mostly lonely. How do you get her interested in something she's able to do?
All ideas will be welcome. Anything that comes to mind.

janilee

Oh, and I only have until Sunday to come up with something because Nelson waited until this morning to call and ask when the party is: Tuesday.

A photo album would be nice.. but is there time to put all the pics together, ayieeee. Also, if someone can do a powerpoint slide show or something similar, set to music to play at the party. My brother in law did this for Grandma's 100th.

Another gift Grandma got was 100 red roses.. we can't all afford that though!

A speech of her life and how appreciative Nelson is- that always gets a few tears. Otherwise I have no clue- something unique and special to their relationship? I'm not too sure. Good luck!!!

I actually did do a nice DVD of Nelson's family, beginning with his grandparent's arrival from Italy in the early 1900's. Nelson's aunt did shout out several times, "Oh, Papa. That's my dear Papa! And Mama!" She laughed and cried through the whole thing. It ended with several pictures of herself with Nelson's mother, who had recently died. After it ended, a cousin from California, who I'd never met, gave me the greatest compliment. She said, "How can you know us so well? How can you love us so much when most of the people on that DVD are gone?" How can you not love a big Italian family who takes you in when you have none of your own?
Unfortunately, Nelson's cousin called tonight and said Lollie is suffering from senile dementia and may not recognize him. From what I've read, old memories are a good stimulation and we are now thinking of trying to find several good CDs that someone can put on for her to listen to. Cross your fingers Nelson can find something good over the weekend.

janilee

I wonder if she has any favorite old movies? And as silly as this sounds, we got my grandmother a big soft teddy bear when my grandfather died so that she'd have it to snuggle with and she did every night.

Gosh Janilee I am not sure either...you see my Grandfather is celebrating his 90th birthday tomorrow..so I am totally confused myself! Congratulations and what a wondeful mile-stone for Nelsons aunt! Best wishes

Does she already have a copy of dvd or could you make a copy for her? Or an old family photograph in a pretty frame? Like you say, if she has dementia then something from her earlier years may get through to her where something from the present day won't.

Oh, lucky me and Good ole' Wally World. I sneaked off and ran to Wal-Mart at lunch and they had nice looking boxed sets of CDs. I got one of Big Band music and one called "The War Years", music from WWII. Hopefully, that will stimulate her memories if she's "foggy" and she'll enjoy the music.
The movies are a good idea, but I haven't a clue what movies she liked, or what actors. My mom had a thing for Mickey Rooney, of all people!
He once had plane trouble and had to land at the tiny field in her hometown and he touched her hand. That's all it took.
I'm so very sorry I can't go along with Nelson to give him support. It's going to be hard for him.

janilee

For my great grandmother's 85th birthday we had a family reunion and all of the grand kids and great grand kids put on a play for her. We even made up a song about her too, to the song Stayin Alive by the Bee Gees... it was so great, I even remember some of it.

Well you can tell by the way the woman walks
She's a woman who's been around the block
Late at night it used to be
She'd watch Jonny Carson on TV

And the chorus went:

She never was a hippie told people that she's sixty
but she's eighty five, eighty five

Ah - Ah ah ah eighty five, eighty five

And you get the rest. She was crying at the end of it

What a great song Alisha!! I was trying to sing it out loud to the tune and it worked out great (not my singing, just the words to the music)